Which animal should I eat first?
I haven’t written anything interesting for days, in part because some of what I really want to write about, I can’t and in part because by the time I get home from the office and do my “musts”, I can’t wait to crawl between my sheets and sleep. Sleep, the antidote for stress, the elixir for avoidance, penicillin for procrastination, the- well, you get the point.
I am watching Mr. and Mrs. Neighborcop’s cats this week while they are away on vacation. I brought in their mail containing NRA renewals and May issues of Hunting and Sex and Terrorists and Sex. I’m kidding about the latter.
Guns scare the *&*^ out of me and while I lack the intellect to successfully debate “Guns kill People” vs. “People kill People” argument, I can’t imagine having a gun in my house. Mr. and Mrs. Neighborcop, Bug and a few others of my friends all grew up around guns and either hunted or shot for target practice and it makes sense that they are card-carrying members of the NRA. Seriously, no judgment. If anything it only makes me feel safer. I wouldn’t even buy a water pistol to scare Pumpkin away from the houseplants.
Shakes is coming with her son this weekend for Memorial Day and they are bravely staying with me in spite of what we suspect are cat allergies for both of them. Her son is 6. You can fit what I know about 6 year old boys in a coffee mug. I think little boys like farting. I’m going to see if I can save some up incase I need them.
Mr. Wii sent me some pictures of himself this afternoon; I’d forgotten how good looking he is and it was nice to have the reminder. He’s coming to see me for 4th of July- can’t wait.
My personal trainer kicked my a** and while I’ve been lazy on my TBL update, I hope to get something posted this week. When I went to my Dr. on Monday she said, “You’re still a lot heavier that what we’d like to see”. I thought, “really?!?!?, because I f-ing LOVE looking like this.”
I also learned this week that being vegan and hypothyroidism are not a good combination. “Why”, you ask in between yawns? Because vegans tend to get protein from soy. Soy behaves as a hormone (particularly in women) and causes the thyroid gland to stop working. I’m having my thyroid checked again this week and it will be interesting to see what the range is. Essentially any good that I’ve done in taking the thyroid medication is un-done by how much soy is in my diet and makes being vegan really tough and likely explains why despite my increased activity levels and plant-based diet, I’m still the size of Hothouse Helga, pictured above.
Interesting to hear about the soy thing. At least now you know why you’re (most likely) not losing.
Re. this weekend, Saturday or Sunday is good for me, but if we go on Saturday I probably can’t stay the night, cause I might be going out. Let me know what’s best for you.
And not to be picky, but did you mean ANTIDOTE for stress?
You may want to reconsider the NRA – or at least water pistols. I find that my squirt bottle is an excellent extension of enforcement of good behavior for my little girl, Limpy (my cat).
Really, anything less than liquid ammo would not scare this cat. I have contemplated target practice at the NRA just to get better at squirting the cat without getting our wood floors wet.
What would you need a water gun for? Pumpkin does what again? Oh yes, she snuggles, eats, craps and watches the occasional fly. I think you are safe in holding off.
5 days till I drag you to Dunkin Donuts and make you watch ME eat. I have a lot of time to make up for!
Love ya!
Hothouse Helga bears an uncomfortable resemblance to a very close friend of mine. Oh, dear! Can you guess who it is?
Hint: Think cougar.