A Unique Grocery Store
All I’m saying is: please don’t bring your kids with you to Trader Joes.
For anyone not living near the oasis that is Trader Joes, it is a grocery store chain that began in California and has been gradually expanding to urban areas with quirky foodstuff aimed (in my opinion ) at the childless and single people who have neither the room nor the appetite for 2 gallons of spaghetti-o’s and 4 tons of toilet paper. If Costco has everything for everyone, then Trader Joes has everything for me.
Only a few hundred square feet larger than a 7-11, Trader Joes has short carts about ¼ the size of what you might find at a Vons, Ralphs, Hen House or Harris Teeter. Where other stores want you to stock up, , Trader Joes has single servings, smaller packages and foodstuff that you can only get at Trader Joes private labeled under their name. Not even Whole Foods compares in either price or selection.
That said, it is wildly inappropriate to bring kids there for several reasons not the least of which is that the aforementioned tiny-carts can’t contain these wee people the way the carts do at Safeway. Hyped up on free samples and a lack of floor space, the kids run at full speed like flies trapped between two panes of glass, bumping dizzily in circles. The end-cap featuring Trader Joes Holiday Ale is no match for child who has been out of school since last Friday. “Clean-up in Asile 2” takes on new meaning when the aisle itself is half the length of bowling lane. One toddler closed the frozen food section for 15 minutes because he picked that exact moment to pitch is 4pm fit.
And don’t get me started on the 8 year old who drank the last of the free coffee. Clearly if that kid isn’t already on Santa’s naughty list, he should be. I’m not just talking about a lump of coal either. I’m talking that in addition to the naughty list, he should be grounded he’s old enough to pay into social security.
I hate grocery shopping. Even on my best day, I hate grocery shopping. Bug says that I should put my Ipod on to pass the time. But Trader Joes is small enough that I don’t feel overwhelmed and when people don’t bring their spawn with them, I can get in and out of there with my cotton grocery bags filled for under $50 and under 30 minutes.
I wasn’t the only childless single person biting their lip tonight. There were a few of us, our carts with the wine to food ratio at 4:1, left finger light staring down the families (HELLO? Really, one of you couldn’t take junior around the corner for some hot chocolate at Starbucks??) as they have the audacity to complain that Trader Joes doesn’t carry Philadelphia Cream Cheese or Tide Detergent- which they don’t by the way. Get in youf Ford Expedition and mosey on over to Walmart for those things. I don’t care where you go.
Just stay out of Trader Joes.
And if you do come, leave the kids at home.
Amen. Again I say, Amen. But what do I know? They didn’t have TJs when you were a tot. Love, Mom
I think there should be a change made to the presents Santa gives to naughty children. Naughty children should no longer receive coal because it is not green, and in the long run punishes the good children as well as the naughty. I also agree though, that children should never be brought on shopping expeditions.
Trader Joe’s is totally awesome, especially for vegans. It’s even good for those of us with those pesky kids. Since they give away helium balloons, the trick is to tell your kid he’ll get a balloon, but only on the way out and only if he hasn’t been a nuisance.
I love Trader Joe’s and so does the Sophie. Yes, she’s 2 and yes, once in a while she’s a bit of a pain but I find the key is to get there in the middle of the day when all you childless folks are at work being productive. Then, the place is full of usually well rested children which I’m guessing is not the case after 5 when the rest of the world shops. Plus, TJ’s has a ton of stuff for the discriminating toddler to eat that is usually without all the crap that the national brands put in there. Organic apple sauce for $1.49 anyone?
Right on – I actually said the same thing when I was in Wegman’s last weekend. Even though the store is gigantic, there is just no room to move. Unless the kids ate in the cart, they just should not be there clogging up the place – no strollers!!!
To extend this idea a bit…I am also of the mind set that there should be planes for business travelers and planes for “families”. I swear there isn’t a flight that I have exited without getting my damn foot almost crushed by some big-over-sized-wheel-base-like-a Hummer SUV-stroller being frantically pushed by some rude mom right in front of the traffic flow from the deplaning passengers.
But, I digress…
Of course, all of these opinions will change once I have a kid
I adore kids. BUT — there are places for them and places not for them. And, if your children are not well-behaved when in public, there are even more places they should not be!!!